OBI WAN KENOBI (TO YODA):
Yoda,
I have encrypted a message in this R2 unit in hopes that one day, you may find yourself in the company of its new owner. I feel that there is something very special about this boy, Luke Skywalker, master Yoda. The force seems to be stronger with him than it was with Anakin all those years ago. He has the same drive, the same…. Passion to learn and grow as his father did before he turned to the dark side, just without as much anger. I believe there is a good chance that he will be the glimmer of hope to the Rebellion and the Jedis.
Master Yoda, I am eager to train this young jedi, as you did for me. I was simply hoping for some advice on how to best train the boy. You see, it would seem to me like I am not quite advanced enough in my studies of the Force to become the teacher for another. Even though you, master Yoda, have said time and time again that I have completed my training and preparation to become a Jedi Master with flying colors, sometimes I doubt my own capabilities.
In any case, I put my hopes for the future of the Jedi and for the Galaxy squarely on his shoulders, I simply want to be able to give him the best training and preparation possible to be the change the galaxy needs. If you ever get the chance to meet this boy, you will surely see this pure potential for yourself. Until then, I bid you adieu.
TATOOINE JAWA TRANSCRIPTION:
To anyone that comes in contact with this droid, heed this warning. This droid, along with his incessantly chatty companion, are the sole property of the Tatooine Jawas and should be returned in case of misplacement. This droid was caught wandering alone through Jawa territory, giving us full jurisdiction to capture and use it as our own property. We don’t actually use any of the droids we catch, we are second hand droid retailers.
This droid has caused us nothing but problems in the short amount of time it was in our possession. It talks obsessively about needing to get back to its master “Obi Kenobi” (clearly it isn’t very well versed in the terms of possession here on Tatooine) and he has some message that could change the galaxy forever. After using multiple persuasive methods to try and release the message from his database, nothing seemed to prove successful.
Whoever the next owner of this irritating droid may be, beware of its obstinance, it may prove to be a very poor worker. Which is why we are offering this droid, and its talkative companion at a substantial mark down in an attempt to get them sold faster. If they have not been sold before the harvest season begins, we will be eager to get it to the depository for compacting. Otherwise, this droid is in relatively good condition and doesn’t show any signs of mechanical problems.
PADME AMIDALA (TO ANAKIN) TRANSCRIPTION:
My Dearest Anakin,
I hope you are well and working very hard to learn the ways of the Jedi. Heaven knows we need more people of your religion, here on Naboo and everywhere in the Galaxy. Send Obi Wan my best. I hope R2 gets to you safely because I have important news regarding the happenings back here on Naboo and in the progression in the fight against the Trade Federation.
I am eager to let you know that I believe I am with child… My doctor thinks it may be two children. I know you’ll be a wonderful father and teacher for these children. I hope they have your eyes and your smile. Mostly, I hope they inherit your connection to the Force. We needn’t worry too much about the children until you complete your training, but I thought I should let you know and hope you share the enthusiasm I have in my heart.
I may not know much about the inner workings of the Force, but I do know that you need to do whatever it takes to complete your training and save ours, and all other galaxies from eternal invasion and damnation by the Trade Federation, or whatever forces of evil may follow it. Do not let your anger and hatred get the best of you, lead with your heart and head not your emotions. You can consider that an order from your Queen, dear Anakin. I hope you come home soon.
NABOO MANUFACTURING TEST MESSAGE TRANSCRIPTION:
This message is a test of functionality on our new batch of Astromech R2 Units. Part of this test will include compiling a message that reaches the droid’s maximum recording limit. In order to accomplish this, we will briefly outline the manufacturing process of this unit.
This R2 unit has been properly equipped with all up to date, Empire-approved software but programmed to align and serve the beliefs and leanings of its master. It has also been programmed to have male characteristics and take on a rather endearing, childlike nature so as to appeal to its owner on an internal level.
If any future owners of this unit watch this, there are extra knuts, bolts, joints, and wheels in the inner left side hidden compartment behind his front facing camera. For assistance assembling or fixing any broken parts, please come and see our maintenance facility here on Naboo at any time.
And of course, failure on this unit’s part to comply with the Droid Bylaws at all times does not make us liable in any way for its behavior. In addition, the droid will be subjected to the appropriate repercussions with its infraction. We do hope whoever owns this droid will be very happy with its condition and the services it provides.
